Fear holding you back? Here’s how to fight it.
Do you have hopes, dreams and ambitions swirling around your head that you want to achieve but feel something is holding you back? Me too! It might be fear — here’s how I learned to fight it.
I think we all have dreams. Some are definitely to be relegated to the realm of fantasy. For example, however diligently you follow what I’m about to set down it’s doubtful you’ll get a date with George Clooney, play for Manchester United or become a billionaire.
There are usually dreams we have that are more realistic which strangely makes them scarier. They seem so tantalisingly close, so possible. But What If?!
If you’re anything like me it’s the what-ifs that keep you paralysed. Dithering about taking the plunge. Deciding one day that Yes! You are going to do it tomorrow. Then when tomorrow comes the what-ifs bombard you and you chicken out.
I have lived a lot of my 40 years feeling this way. Taking fairly entry-level jobs because I was afraid to fail if I aimed higher. Not taking up hobbies that looked like fun because I was afraid people would laugh at me. Not approaching men I found attractive because I was fat and I was convinced they’d reject me.
Needless to say, this has led to my life being far less fulfilling or satisfying than it could have been. I have always been jealous of the people who go into things with “Dr Pepper” mindset — what’s the worst that could happen? I’m even more jealous of people brimming with self-confidence. My sister has a best friend who is like that. She truly believes she’s awesome and can do anything. What must that be like?
I do believe though that there are a lot of people like me out there which is why I’m writing this article. Over the last 5 years or so I’ve begun to make strides in moving past my fears. I’m still a long way from where I want to be but I’ve also made a lot of progress from where I was.
My secret? Lists! I know it sounds too simple to work but it does. I’ve always been an obsessive list writer. They help give me structure, a schedule and I accomplish far more than I would without it. There’s nothing I love more than…